Swim Lessons! Oh, boy...

 There has been a lot going on around here lately! Rachel and I met Daddy at our gym on Thursday June 30th. I can say "our" gym now because I had my tour (finally!) that day, got my ID card, checked out the Kids Klub for Rachel, and told myself that I was, after a year of having the memberhip!, going to use it, darn it! June 30th is also the day we signed Rachel up for...gulp...Swimming Lessons! She was pretty excited that day, especially when she found out her teacher's name is also "Rachel"! So for 12 days, I was taking her to Kids Klub, showing her the pool, talking to her and "preparing" her for Swimming Lessons. She met Teacher Rachel several times etc...

Yesterday, July12, was her very first day. She stated to me quite simply when I was changing her into her bathing suit, "Rachel doesn't want to go swimming." Another little talk ensued loaded with encouragement. I went over all the details of what to expect...well, the best I could anyway. I talked to her about "trying things". I began to strongly regret letting so much time elapse since she had last been in a "big pool". She has always loved the water, but her shyness, anxiety, and opinions are much greater theses days! Oh, boy...

To be honest, I knew it would be hard to drop her at the pool next to her classmates and teacher and walk out of the pool area completely. I also knew that that was how her teacher wanted it and truly what would work best for the learning process. I talked to her teacher and we agreed it could happen gradually if need be. When it came right down to it...it was THE hardest thing I have ever done. We, yes Daddy was there thank goodness, soon realized that talking and reasoning with her was not going to work.  She wanted no part of it. She was afraid, no doubt about it, simple as that. I ended up depositing my crying "baby girl" into her teacher's arms, literally prying her fingers off me, backing up and walking away...sobbing! Seriously, I could not help it. Did I mention this was THE hardest thing I have ever done? I have tears streaming down my face just writing this and remembering her cries. I turned toward the wall and tried to compose myself. I did not really want her or the other mommies gathered outside the doors to see me. Too late, pretty much everyone saw the whole display:(. Yay. Besides, the composure was brief. I crumpled when I got out the door and saw Frank. OMG! How could I abandon her that way? What kind of a mommy am I?  I then met three of the nicest mommies I have EVER met in any acivity we have had Rachel in! Wow! They empathized and assured me they had truly all "been there".  I so appreciated that, especially after the crap that has been said to me at Gymnastics:(. So, I sat and "hid" behind a large, green, leafy plant and watched Rachel sit on the side of the pool while the other kids splashed around and had a blast. My heart hurt just a little more with each passing moment. She looked so distraut, so detached, so sad, so "abandoned". Then we, even the other three mommies, all smiled and got just a little excited when she let Teacher Rachel "swim" in the water with her in her arms:). Hey, got to celebrate the baby steps! She did manage to "escape" once! She walked slowly then faster and faster until she was running and came flying over to the doors she saw us exit through! Frank went out and caught her before she reached her destination! He escorted her back to her class, talked a moment and came back...big wet spot on his shirt from holding her:). He was quite pleased with himself as he got her to return to class and stay! Apparently he promised her a pony or a car or something! Anyway, that was the longest 30 minutes ever, but we made it through Day 1! The above picture was at the end of class as she worked her way to her daddy.

Day 2!

Rachel running to the car with backpack on.

She was actually excited!

Her backpack had her bathing suit, cover-up,

Nemo "swimmers" and flip flops

in it.

 So...on the way home from class yesterday, she talked to me about it. Some of her first words were, "Rachel cried because Rachel was scared." (yes, she still refers to herself in the 3rd person, but less and less now. i still think it is cute:)) I told her it was okay as it was the very first time she ever had a swim lesson and that it was okay to be afraid. I told her the next time would be better and to give it a chance. I asked her if she enjoyed what she did do. She said she did. Then she said...very softly, "Rachel cried but I am not a baby, Momma. I am a big girl." Oh, my sweet, little angel. I'm not sure, but I think she was embarrassed! She kept bringing it up and telling me the same thing. I just wanted to pull the car over, get into the backseat and hold her and reassure her that yes, she IS a big girl and that it IS okay to be afraid...especially when something is new and seems scary. Well, I continued to drive, hid my teary eyes from her and did the "reassuring" part. I also told her that her daddy and I were VERY proud of her and how she stayed with her class, listened  to her teacher, and did try some of the things. I told her the 2nd day would be better, then the third etc...She told me she wasn't going swimming again:).

Day 2!

A quick pic in the

Locker Room!

She looked adorable in her

daisy swimsuit and so little

next to the lockers:).  

Well, because of a schedule conflict, Day 2 was today instead of being on Thursday. Her classes are supposed to be on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  I started early, like the night before, talking to her about what we were going to do on Wednesday. We'd go to the Gym/Kids Klub so mommy could workout, then we'd go out to lunch wherever she chose, then back to the gym for Swim Class, then to Target etc...She knew the "schedule" and recited it back to me. She told me what we'd do at each location...including "Rachel is not going swimming today." My response, "Um, yes you are, Sweetie." You have a class with swim buddies and a nice teacher, it is not the first day anymore and you know just what to expect etc...I asked her if maybe she would like a treat after class...I am not above using "incentives" when necessary! (A moms gotta do what a moms gotta do!) She said she would, of course. I told her she could get a lollipop, a rare treat in our house, at Target if she went to Swim Class. She told me she might cry. I told her that was okay, but that there were "5 rules" now. I really tried to make it "Three Special Steps" like on Special Agent Oso, but I couldn't. She listened to the rules, agreed and repeated them back to me several times. We discussed them. I spoke firmly:). She said she'd give it another try! My "5 Rules" are as follows:

1-put on bathing suit

2-stay with class

3-listen to teacher/learn

 4-participate when you want to/feel comfortable

5-do your best/have fun

Hmmm...

This is the look I got when I asked for a

little smile in the Locker Room!

I was nervous about having a camera in there

and did not even realize she did NOT smile at the time.

Okay...I know you are anxious to know how Day 2 went! Um, better. Not great, but better. The bathing suit part and waiting for class to begin went very well with a few "rule" reminders. She was very excited when the other little girl in her class, Sloane, who is also 3 came. We went over to say "hi" to her and her baby brother. All was good...until Teacher Rachel came to the door to get the kids. I saw my Rachel's lip trembling and felt her fingers digging into my thigh, but I kept my eyes high and my voice excited. "It's time for class to start, Rachel! Teacher Rachel is here. You can go in with your new friends. Mommy will stay and talk to the other mommies etc..." As soon as she realized she was on one side of the door and I was not following, she turned, eyes welled up with tears and she almost got sandwiched in the door trying to get back to me! I put on a happy face, told her I'd see her after classa and to have fun! Teacher Rachel then scooped her up and carried her over to the side of the pool. My Rachel sat on the side of the pool for much of the class, however she did let Teacher Rachel take her into the water 3 times! Yes, we counted 3! One time Rachel even jumped from the side of the pool into her arms! Yay! She waved to me a couple of times and I waved back. I saw Sloane splashing her and trying to get her to join her on the steps where they wait for their turn:). Then I saw Rachel reaching over as far as she could to try to splash the water with her hands from the edge. I still felt a little tug at my heart as I know she really "wants" to get in there and play! She wants to join the others in splashing and having fun! (I can also relate to this myself being one who usually sits on the "sidelines" because of fears, insecurities, not fitting in etc...I will do everything I can to help my daughter not go through life like me! She is so beautiful and so good at things once she tries and gives things a chance. I want her to be confident and secure. Just  a mommy wish:)) At the end of class, I walked in to get her and she came to me with a HUGE smile on her face. She was proud that she "stayed with her class and tried some new things". I told her I was VERY proud of her too and commented that she was a "very brave big girl". She liked that a lot! Then she reminded me that we were going to Target to get a "treat"! So...now we have a container of lollipops in the pantry. I'm thinking they just might come in handy over the next few weeks! Oh, and she used to potty at the gym...twice! This was pretty terrific too as she usually likes to wait until we get home. I do not know how she can hold it to be honest. What I thought was really cute...though some of the members might not think so...what a bunch of sourpusses!...was when we were walking from the locker room to the lobby and she looked up at me and said, "They are exercising and getting healthy like you, Momma!" I smiled and agreed and she said, "They are doing their workouts!". Too cute as she obviously remembers what I tell her when I drop her off at the Kids Klub. Well, 2 down, 4 to go for this session! We'll have to see how next Tuesday goes...